Oh, I tried so hard not to feel [Tag :: Ella]

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
hold on to me love
you know i can't stay long

Ella had never really felt this way before. She had not been in a situation where she could openly be herself with a friend and she never normally trusted this much. Oh god, how much had she already trusted him, it was unusual in her nature to be this carefree, but that was just it. Kistin made her feel so happy and carefree, she felt like she could tell him that as soon as she left school she would be on the run and he wouldn't care. Maybe he had already figured it out; after all he did know she was Muggleborn. However she also knew that he might not be so informed on what truly happened to Muggleborns, there were a lot of rumours but only a Muggleborn truly knows the extent of what it means, even some other impurities, half bloods do not like being seen with her, because it would worsen their situation. She didn't blame them, she could see their point of view, and she was the lowest of the low in their eyes. So why the hell was this funny, charismatic, attractive vampire, flirting and talking with her. She chuckled then as he said his reason was 'moral enough' but then listened to his serious comment turning into a flirt at the end, oh she should of known, neither of them seemed able to keep a serious conversation up right at that moment. Nor did she want to " sooo the one of bite you wasn't interested in a servant then" She then realised how deeply personal that question may be, she paused and added quickly " erm you don't have to answer that if you don't want to" She shrugged and looked sheepish, mentally cursing herself for being so outspoken.

She laughed as he teased her " No, remember I ran away duh" She gave him a serious look, but couldn't hold it and snickered, but she stopped as he picked her up, she froze, and then relaxed within an instant smiling down at him. She felt like a little child, she swung her feet slightly " Errr Different" she comment lightly, her hazel eye gleaming as she gazed down at him, she smiled brightly. However as he put her back down she got her balance back and listened to his reply, she laughed at his attempt to keep a straight face " no soft toy, just me"

Her parents had always told her off for sitting on cross-legged on chairs, but he didn't seem to mind. She listened to his reasoning behind not having a chair, she got the don't really want to go into details vibe so managed to keep her curiosity to herself. Although as he said about height again she frowned, she had to crane her neck to look down. She fidgeted then slid off the chair and next to Kistin and went back into her folded leg position " Narrr, plus that is just not normal to have one person on a chair and the other not" she seemed to have no problem with the floor, well she wouldn't she was used to sitting on seats that took skill to sit on because they were on the edge of breaking under you. That was the way it work, purebloods sat on the nice new desks at the front where they got the most attention, then half bloods on old scratched ones then Muggleborns got the oldest and dirtiest ones. She had sat on a lot worse basically. However he did not need to know about the true dangers of being a muggle born she was in, it was not his burden, and after all they had only just met.

But as he spoke in a patronising tone, she smirked, raising an eye brow as he spoke. She watched him, amused " aww spoil sport killing you would so much more fun" She smiled wickedly at him, but it soon turned into a grin. She noticed her jaw was starting to ache with all the smiling, and laughing, however she didn't mind, she liked it. She noticed how he seemed to gaze at her when she had had her hair down, she hated her hair, boring brown like her eyes. Plus having it down was an annoyance so most of the time she had it up in her loose pony tail. She looked however in to his deep entrancing eyes as he brushed a finger under her chin, she heard his words; she nodded slowly in agreement, her own gaze soft and warming. Although as he thanked her for the change in subject she shrugged slightly. She smiled weakly though as he said about being treated an adult and she then lent slightly against him, she had kind of done absent minded, she didn't even realise she was doing it for a few seconds, once she had she remained there wondering if he would mind, after a few moments she then commented lightly " your comfy" it felt like his body had been designed for her, she fit just nicely into side, she liked that thought, of being by his side. But why the hell, he was just some strange persons he had met today, yet she felt something, trust? She didn't trust anyone; at least not like this. She let her mind wonder away who cared what these feelings were; they felt good, what else mattered? Not much right at that moment.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

As she asked about the Vampire that bit him, he opened his mouth...and then shut it again. He heard her get-out-clause, and he looked at her, his lips pursed. What did he say? It was something deeply personal...something that had changed his life...and his brother's. he looked at her, his brows furrowed in deep thought. He then looked away and said quietly, "It's okay. You've got a right to ask. I understand." He turned back to her and sighed gently. "I don't know what the Vampire who turned me wanted. For all I know, it could have been more than one Vampire." He looked to the ground and then looked back at her. "There was a group of them...they turned me and my brother." He paused and then continued. "And they killed our father." He shook his head gently. "I don't think either of us really understand why they didn't kill us too. Maybe it was spite; maybe it was rage...who knows?" He was silent for a few moments, unsure of what else to say. He'd tell her about his claustrophobia. Eventually.

As she returned to teasing him, he smiled. "Yeah, because you're almost 100 miles away from me now, aren't you?" He replied, sarcastically, his demeanour becoming more like it had previously been. As he picked her up, he saw her smile and he smiled back. It was like a scene from some cheesy muggle film. Her reply made him laugh. "Only different? Are you sure you're not cold up there - the difference in pressure must be massive!" He said, sticking his tongue out at her and winking. Not that he was implying that she was majorly short or anything - Much.

Her reply to the "soft toy" comment was met with a shrug and an arm around her waist. "Well...you're just as soft as a big cuddly toy. Can I keep you - instead of the nonexistent prize?" He asked, the "puppy dog" look in his eyes. He saw her sit on the chair, and after a few moments, get off and sit next to him. It wasn't what he'd expected, but he felt slightly touched that she'd prefer to sit at the same level as him than be higher. Equality and all that jazz. It had never really mattered to Kistin about all that - usually he was taller than most, anyway, but it seemed to matter to him at that moment. He had no idea why, but he didn't feel he needed one. He heard her words and shrugged. "Fair enough. I could always conjure myself a seat too, though - I don't want you to feel obliged to sit on the cold, hard floor."

He heard her response to his patronising tone, and laughed at it, a look of shock on his face as he saw her wicked grin. "You...you...you...sadistic woman!" He eventually said, clasping at his heart. "It is not more fun to kill me. It is not. Not!" He looked at her in disbelief...and then burst out laughing again. "I should become an actor with the Muggles. I'd be a hit!" He said, grinning. As he touched her chin, their eyes met for a moment again, and his heart almost skipped a beat...there was definitely something true about the old adage "the eyes are the windows to the soul", because he was seeing something, but he couldn't make out what. He didn't want to know what his eyes were betraying to her. If hers were showing glimpses of emotion - his were telling book after book of stories.

However, he felt her brush against his side. He turned his head to see her, and she was leaning on him. Without thinking, he placed his arm around her, and rested it upon her waist. He heard her comment, and smiled down at her as her head rested on his shoulder. "I'm glad. I wouldn't want to be uncomfortable." He looked at her, and then gently rested his cheek upon the top of her head. He was wondering if he ought to be cuddling with her - they were strangers, and had only met that very day. But...something had clicked. Something felt right.No...not just something. EVERYthing felt right. He sat there quietly with her, not knowing what to say.

[Sorry it was so late before the reply was sent. I finally found some muse at 11 o'clock at night. Silly, really.]

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
hold on to me love
you know i can't stay long

She was pretty much throwing every curse she had, at herself. Why had she been so stupid, she eyed him, she could see it was difficult, again with the mentally slapping of herself. She felt guilty for going that deep, but then he answered, seeing him look away. She looked at the ground, guilt nibbling at her insides. She silently listening, glancing at him every now and then, there was a pause after he had done, then she said " I am sorry, and I don't have a right to ask, you just tell me when I get too nosey" She eyed him softly watching him lightly, trying to reassure him in some way, she was sorry she had approached the subject, as while her curiosity was happy to know even more about him as it seemed to grave knowledge about him like some drug, she felt she may have tried dig too deep too fast.

She was glad when the mood lightened somewhat, she chuckled lightly as he replied to answer " Well you see I am just amazing at making little fake Ellas appear to distract you while I run away" She was starting to feel the kind of cheesiness of when he was holding her up. She smiled, it didn't take much to hold her up, she was slim, but however she was lithe in muscle, she was no weakling. However as he spoke, she smirked then hit him playfully on the shoulder " haha did you know that sticking your tongue out is very childish" she spoke in a stern voice and had a serious face, she raised an eye brow to him, still with her deadly serious face. However she then couldn’t hold it she smiled and laughed, then spoke " I am not small, your just big, I am average sized" She pouted over the top, she was being childish, but she liked it, them, she had not been relaxed enough to be a child in a while.

His arm slipped around her, she liked it, she fitted there, his arm fitted around her waist perfectly she noticed, as he spoke she chuckled, looking up at him gently, maybe he already had her "how could I say no those eyes" She smiled, eyeing them gently with her own. She smiled. As he spoke however about her not having to sit on the floor, she shrugged lightly, she didn't mind " I have had to sit on worse" She commented lightly, potions was one of the worst for having rubbish desks for muggleborns. She smiled at him reassuringly; she really was fine with it. She glanced outside, the sun was still up and blazing, it seemed a life time ago she was running away from Slytherins. She sighed then as he replied to her sarcasm she smirked and looked back at him, chuckling under her breath. " So I am Sadistic and Sarcastic now?" She smiled at him then as he said about killing him " erm I suppose could keep you as a pet, get you a collar and everything". She laughed at his muggle comment however, her laugh mixed with his " yea you will have little eleven year old girls wanting your autograph" Some people were crazy like that, she could quite happily say that she was not one of the girls that sleep over night outside celebrities houses just for a glimpse of them. She mocked them instead. Then she saw his eyes, she looked deep into them, she saw him in them, his playfulness, but she also felt she saw something else, something darker, she gazed into them searching them, she smiled at him softly as she did " I love your eyes" she said quietly, she had spoken absent minded, not really aware she had said it at all. She was brought back to earth, shot him a weak smile and shrugged again.

She suddenly felt his arm around her, she automatically she relaxed into his side even further. She had a warm feeling about her. She felt so secure in his arms, like nothing in the world was going to hurt her now he had an arm safely around her. She like this feeling, then he spoke, she smiled to herself, and snuggled in deeper she placed a hand on top of his that was on her waist, looking up at him. She knew they had only just met; maybe it was her desperation to be accepted that had driven her to trust him like this. But something told her it was something else, she had that warm secure feeling, they sat silently, she didn't know what to say. Nothing needed to be said, the silence said it all, it was nice and peaceful. After a few minutes of the blissful silence in which she had closed her eyes, she could feel his cheek on her head, she still had a smile on her face, she spoke softly, feeling loud after the silence " can we see each other again Kistin" She asked lightly, moving her head so he would have to move his and then looking up at him, her Hazel eyes shining with hope that he would say yes.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

After he had told her about the vampires that had turned him, he heard her voice. "No, really," he said, looking at her. "It's fine. I just I don't tell many people about my past. There's...there's a lot of stuff that happened..." He smiled at her, trying to alleviate any worries or guilt she felt. "It's like that old saying - the more you say something, the less painful it is - well, I've said it only only a couple of people, so it's still a rather painful thing. You weren't being nosy, you were being inquisitive. I get on well with inquisitive people."

When she mentioned the fake Ella's, he burst into laughter. "Ah, I see. So when you got bored of me...no, sorry, you ran away in fright, you left your clone behind. I see. Very clever. So how do I turn the fake one off? Like, so that I can see the real one running away?" He asked, a devilish grin on his face. "Is this how I do it?" He said, as he began to tickle her sides. He was always interested to find out if the person he was with was ticklish. It was the practical joker within him. If they were ticklish, it meant that he could use it to play jokes on them. As he put her down after lifting her up, he had spoken, and her reply was coupled with a tap on his shoulder. He looked at her in disbelief. "Did you just hit me?" He said, in disbelief, and then moved quickly towards her (which wasn't very far at all) and proceeded to lift her up once more, but with a less tight grip than before. He wouldn't drop her, but she'd have more freedom of movement. "I'm the big, scary Vampire." He said, with mock aggressiveness in his voice. "Don't forget that I can pick you up and you can't do anything about it." He stuck his tongue out again, and then let go of her. As she dropped slightly, he moved his arms and positioned them so that as he caught her, she was sitting in his arms. "See what I mean?" He said, and winked. He placed her back on the ground and grinned. Hearing her words about him sticking his tongue out, he did it again. "So I'm a 107-year-old child. What's wrong with that?" he said, shrugging. "I'm barely more than an adolescent in Vampire terms!" He said, laughing. As she explained her height, he grinned - and her pout was oh-so-cute. "I'm shorter than my brother - he'd dwarf you. And I never said you were short - you took it to mean that." He said, the grin unmoving.

As she agreed that she'd take the place of the cuddly toy, he squeezed her gently. "Well...the best way to say "no" to my eyes is to look at them, make an "n" sound and follow it with an "o"." He said, pedantically, chuckling gently. "I never found it too difficult...but then again, I don't usually say no to my own eyes - that could be interesting." As they sat together, Kistin turned to her as she spoke. "Seriously? What, do they make you sit on razors or something at Hogwarts?" He asked. She commented on how he had called her sadistic. He thought for a moment and then looked at her. "In effect...Yes. Yes, you are sadistic AND sarcastic." He said, laughing. "How many other words can I find that suit you that are alliterative..." He said, a look of concentration on his face, however her next words took him by surprise. "Pet? I think you've forgotten, Ella, that I'm a Vampire. Not a Werewolf. Two completely different species, hon." He said, ironically. He looked at her and rolled his eyes. "Honestly...you're doomed if you can't even remember a thing like that." he said, grinning "Eleven year old girls?" he said, in response to her next comment, "Joys. I hope none of your clones can shrink," he said, a wry smile on his face. He carried on, sarcastically, "because I'd just hate being surrounded by Ella's." As they looked into each other's eyes he fell silent, and then heard her comment. He said nothing but smiled.

As she snuggled closer to him, his arm moved with her. After he spoke, he felt her hand on his. The difference in their hands was huge. Hers were tiny compared to his; nimble, almost fragile fingers against his large, worn ones. Her skin was soft and delicate (if he dared use the word about Ella), while his hands were rough and worn. He looked down at her as she looked up at him. He smiled softly at her - a content, happy smile. Minutes passed by, but they were the most contented minutes Kistin had spent since...well, since being turned. Eventually, he heard Ella's voice, and felt her head move below his cheek. He lifted his head and looked down at her. He placed the hand that wasn't on her waist, under her chin again. "If that's what you want." He said, the soft smile returning. "Of course we can meet again. When, and where would you like to meet?" He asked her. "Though I would recommend meeting in the evening hours. I'm not a fan of sunlight - go figure." He added.

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
hold on to me love
you know i can't stay long

As he said about getting on well with inquisitive people she chuckled lightly " that much is kinda obvious or I think you might have drop kicked me out of this cave by now" she felt nosey all the same. She smiled at him; it seemed she could do no wrong, traits about her personality that others found annoying he seemed to enjoy. She just smiled serenely at him as he laughed about her joke about clone Ellas, as he finished she smirked and then replied calmly " No way of turning it off, and the Real Ella has gone to enjoy the company of Slytherins because you were so bad" now that was harsh, but she chuckled and her tone had made it clear she was joking, plus she got another hit at the Slytherins. But then she saw the devilish grin, and then she jumped as he touched her sides, she squealed for a split second and laughed trying to pull his hands away, crying out "No, don't tickle me " Ella was extremely ticklish, one touch in the right place got her going. She calmed down once he had stopped and put a disgruntled kind of face on and gave him an attempt at an angry face, but it was more comical than anything else.

However then as she hit him, he seemed barely to notice, then his question " tried to, doesn't look it had much effect" she pouted slightly but then didn't expect to suddenly be off her feet again, she dangled, she felt less grip on her but didn't play eyeing him amused as he spoke. She snorted as she tried to stop herself from laughing as Kistin said about being a scary vampire. However as he said she couldn't do anything about it a wicked glint appeared in her eyes and her hand slipped into her robes and she drew her wand "Really?" but she chuckled and put it back away again, but then he dropped her and recaurght her. She looked surprised and laughed in his arms as he held her and then put her down. She chuckled with him at their own jokes. As he said about being a child she shrugged " nothing" and she poked her own tongue out at him. Although as he said about his brother and what he claimed he had never said she chuckled " I suppose you weren't implying at all about my height with that pressure comment" she raised an eye brow smoothly.

Then is advice on how to say no came, she chuckled then looked deeply into his eyes " Nnn" she faulted, acting it up, she opened her mouth in an 'o' shape but then changed " yes" then chuckled " didn't work" She brushed her hair back letting her hand run through it like she had so many times before, it was still in its pony tail loose the way she had put it, but as she had brushed it back some more strands had come loose to join those at the side of her face. Then Kistin asked about what she sat on " nearly, the wood is normally splintering and the desks take skill to balance on" she shrugged, she had been dealing with it for nearly 7 years, she had got over it. She then laughed with him as he said about her character, she chuckled but then as he asked for more alliterate words she suggested lightly " Sceptical?".

Then the pet comments came, she laughed lightly letting her laugh flow from her as he said about her forgetting, she had of course not forgotten. " I didn't forget, I Wanted pet a Vampire duh" she rolled her eyes " and you say I am doomed" She then heard his cheeky comments about more Ellas, she was tempted to hit him again, although it would have no effect, but instead decided to keep her dignity and pouted - if that was any better. " That’s why I only left one clone to distract you" Then there was some more eye gazing, it seems they couldn't help it. His smile was so handsome coupled with his eyes; she found it strangely addictive to watch him, the more she did the more she wanted to continue.

She looked down at her hand next to his; she had never really thought of having small hands, but his were a lot bigger and different, the only difference being the colour of them. Hers were only had slightly more colour, well only just, Ella had very pale skin naturally which refused to tan in the sun. His were only just paler by the look of it. The minutes when only breathing was the noise that filled the cave was blissful. Then came her question. She felt his hand under her chin, she smiled softly back at him, looking into his eyes " Spring break next week, do you want to come and meet up? she asked lightly, she had a feeling this was going to be the best spring break ever. It seems just as she was going to have to start the long old run after Hogwarts fate had decided to give her something to look forward to, she wondered if Kistin would mind the fact she would be on the run, as she didn't want to go to Azkaban.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

"I could drop kick you out of this cave now if you want." He offered. He heard her jibe and looked affronted, and then put on a face of sheer horror. "The Slytherins! Oh no! I wasn't that bad...I wasn't!" He said, with the air of a five year old trying to get himself out of trouble. However, as he tickled her, he was more than pleased with the result. The squeal was hilarious. He carried on tickling her as she begged for him to stop, and he was laughing as he did so. After a minute or so, he stopped and allowed her to get her breath back. "Oh." He said, nonchalantly, "I didn't realise you were ticklish. So sorry." He looked at her with an honest face, but he knew she wouldn't fall for it - after all...he had been laughing like a maniac.

When she replied cheekily to his question he shrugged. "No, but I felt it." Then, as he was holding her, he saw her grin and looked at her, concerned. When her wand appeared, he laughed. "I've got one of those too. I just can't quite reach it while you're in my arms." When he dropped her, he saw her surprise and laughed with her. "Sorry, did I scare you?" He asked, an eyebrow raised. As she asked about his comment, he nodded. "I most definitely did not imply that you were short with my comment on pressure. Okay?"

He saw her stand in front of him, and he wondered what she was doing, until he saw her "trying" to say no. When she failed, he patted her soothingly on her back, and said, comfortingly, "you'll get the hang of it. Don't worry." As she corrected his thoughts about her sitting on razor blades, he looked at her in shock. "They let you do that? But then again...no-one will stop them from doing it." He sighed. "I guess I better get practicing - conjuring you a chair that's the most comfortable one ever - to make up for all the awful ones you're used to." He said, smiling.

"Hmmm...I was more thinking "super" and "smart" - or along those lines." He said, shrugging, "but sceptical works." As she laughed again, he smiled, Her laugh was great, it made him feel carefree and he forgot all his troubles. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise that Vampires were also a domesticated species." he said saracastically, raising his eyebrows at her. "So that's where I've been going wrong all these years. And I still think you're doomed."

As she pouted, he laughed. "Ah, I see. So you were kind enough to leave me with one clone, but not the real Ella." He sighed and rolled his eyes. "I guess I'll have to live with that."

In the minutes they sat in silence, it was blissful. He sat there contentedly, and when he lifted her head up and heard her reply, he found an urge in himself to kiss her. He nodded and replied "Spring Break sounds good, though I'm not sure if I would suggest your cousin meeting me. In the...uh...past, many of the Vampires were on Voldemort's side. No doubt she'll have faced many. I wouldn't wish to bring up any old vendettas." The urge was still there to kiss her, and he realised in milliseconds that he had the perfect opportunity, though he had a pang of a feeling he hadn't had for years about anyone other than his brother. Concern.

He was concerned that it was too soon. He had met her for the first time, and suddenly they were resting against each other like old flames. This whole thought process seemed to take no more than a few more milliseconds, and he decided. He didn't want to risk scaring her off, but he thought from the way she acted, that she wouldn't have any objections. He still had a hand under her chin, and he kept it there. He leant in slightly, and then all the way. His lips met hers, and he held there for a couple of seconds. Her lips were soft and gentle, and somehow, to him, it felt right. He had met many young women (after all...107 years is a long time) and none of those he had got close to made him feel as content as just sitting with Ella had. He lifted his mouth away from hers, and looked back into her eyes. He was hoping he hadn't alienated her; that he hadn't gone too far too fast.

His lips pursed and he sat in silence, hoping he hadn't gone too far.

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
Hold On To Me Love
You Know I Can't Stay Long

Ella's heard him offer to drop kick her out the cave, she smirked " nope I am good thanks" She replied eyeing him lightly, then the Slytherin joke came, she managed to keep her face straight as he looked in horror at her. She wondered what the Slytherins themselves would think to his reaction, well for one, Kistin might be rejected even more, Ella was not fully aware of what people reacted like around Vampires, she knew werewolves were outcasts. Then as he tickled her, she did squeal, and continued to cringe and wriggle as he tickled her, begging him to stop. At last he stopped, she was out of breath, she glared at him through strands of hair that had come out even more from her tickling session, and her hair was across her face. She huffed and ran her hand through it, pulling it back off her face to the side as she did so. His face was so false however she snorted " you are not innocent" She raised an eyebrow to him, showing she was nowhere near fooled, the laughing like a maniac had given it away somewhat.

Then he was holding her and telling her about his wand, she smirked at him, not needing to say aloud that she knew he couldn't hold her and reach for his wand at the same time. She landed on her feet fine, regaining her balance, she chuckled as he asked if he had scared her, " you’re a Big Scarwie Vampire remember" She smiled at him radiantly, that was going to be a joke between them that was going to last awhile. Ella loved Private jokes, they made life fun, and it made her laugh when you said them around other people and they looks at your bemused because they have no idea what you’re on about or what’s so funny. However as he tried to protest his innocence again, she snorted, raised an eyebrow and spoke " rubbish".

She was surprised to see him shocked about the condition in which she worked, then again she shouldn't. Not many were fully aware of what Hogwarts was like now unless you were a Victim of it. She smiled at him though as he said about conjuring a chair " my cousin can conjure up a beanbag" she smiled, she loved beanbags they were very comfy you could curl up and fall asleep in them very easily. She smiled at him, his smile made her smile, it was like a drug though now she was smiling she couldn't stop, his smile seemed to light up everything for her.

Then he was naming her characteristics. She smiled as he called her super and smart. She wasn't as great as he kept saying; he seemed to like her bad qualities almost as well as her good ones. Then he commented on how she thought he was a pet she chuckled " Yep, Look I will even get you a bowl with Kistin on it" She smiled at him, the absurd idea of him drinking out of a bowl nearly had her laughing again. She then eyed him curiously " so why exactly am I doomed?" She asked playfully, watching him carefully with her hazel eyes. Then the joke about the clones continued, it seemed they had many jokes and neither one of them was backing down, good, she liked a battle of wits, she hated when people responded to her sarcasm with more sarcasm and when she responded again they got annoyed, Kistin got the jokes, he was a real sport, she liked it a lot. £ The clone is exactly like the real one anyway" she shrugged as though it didn't matter.

Silence was bliss, Ella loved the silence, and she found it calming, just being next to him, leaning on him, Ella was so used to moving with the shadows, blending in with the darkness, being silent. She was used to being quiet, unheard and unseen, yet here, with him, she could finally be herself. He made her feel safe, Ella for as long as she could remember had always had to fight for herself, she had always had to be strong, but for some reason, she felt with him here, if someone tried to attack her now, she wouldn't have to worry, he would be there, to guard her to keep her safe. His eyes sparkled as she looked into them but she also saw something primitive and yet it seemed like he was holding back, she saw something she had only seen in her parents' eyes, he was thinking about her, concern was in him. But then he lent in, she wondered, and then it clicked what he was doing a second before his lips met hers. She watched him gentle as he pulled back, a pang deep within her, an animalistic instinct wanted more, but she kept it down. She eyed him gently he seemed to be waiting for her reaction, then a warm true smile spread across her lips, she eyed him, watching him, then red flushed her cheeks, she felt the heat of her blood course through her. Her smile turned into a small chuckle and she leaned forward and lent forward being closer to him, no words needed for that moment, silence told their story, she sighed " Kistin...." she drifted slightly looking back at him and those ice blue eyes she seemed to have managed to get addicted, she shrugged what did she say, they had only known each other for less than a day, and yet he seemed so right for her " you’re like no one I have ever met before" and she didn't mean the fact he was the first Vampire she had ever met.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

"Oh, are you sure?" He said, a hint of disappointment in his voice. "It'd be no problem - really!" He had a wry grin on his face. When he had finished tickling her, he looked at her. She looked rather cute with her hair everywhere, and her huffing made her look more so. As he heard her rebuffal, he looked at her, his mouth open. "What ever makes you say that?! I'm most definitely innocent, oh yes." He looked at her hair, and then ran his own hand through it. "You seem to run your hands through it a lot, why can't I? You should take it out of the hairband again - I love the way it looks." He commented.

As the "Big Scarwie Vampire" comment made a comeback, he held his hands up as if in surrender. "I should have expected that, shouldn't I?" He looked at her and frowned. "No-one out-jokes the joker, though" he said, waggling a finger at her. "Mind out - you do realise I've got to get my crown back, don't you? I'm definitely not going to let it be stolen by an..." he gasped, "Ella clone."

When he protested his innocence and heard her one word answer, he looked affronted. "It's true." He said, allowing himself to pout a little. He was realising he was doing it an awful lot, and it wasn't a particularly...manly...nor Vampirish, thing to do. "Why...don't you believe me?" He asked, sadly.

As she spoke of getting him a named bowl, he looked at her with mock enthusiasm. "Wow! A bowl! Aren't I just the luckiest man on Earth? Not only am I a "pet", but I get my own bowl! Wow!" He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. As she asked him why she was doomed, he raised an eyebrow and laughed. "You're asking me why you're doomed, when you're talking of getting me a named bowl? Do you see how you've answered your own question?" He asked, both eyebrows now raised. "I think I might take back saying that you're smart." He said, a small frown on his face, and then laughed. As she brought the clones back up, he laughed. "But you're still a clone. Whether you're like the real Ella or not, it still matters!"

After he had kissed her, he sat, almost holding his breath for her response. Needless to say, he was relieved (to say the least) to see her smile, and then the red blush grow upon her cheeks. He smiled back at her, and pulled her closer to him. He assumed that the fact her blood was now so close to her skin was the reason he could smell it so much more clearly. Damn being a vampire. "You smell very good," he said, in passing. He hoped she wouldn't look too deep in his words, but the smell was almost intoxicating. "Incredibly good." Okay, that time, he hadn't meant to say it out loud. As she sighed, he looked at her, concerned...and then heard her speak his name. "Ella...?" He said in reply. As she continued, he smiled. He was about to say something smart, and then decided against it. Now was not the time. "And I must say," he said, his voice soft, "that you are the most amazing and intriguing young woman I have ever met. And that's a feat." He smiled at her again, and then leant back in towards her. As he kissed her again, this time he didn't pull away. It felt too right to pull back.

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
Hold On To Me Love
You Know I Can't Stay Long

She eyed him as he tried to make her take up the offer of being drop kicked out the cave " now look how is trying to rid of the other" She rose an eyebrow after all his joking about her getting rid of him, he walked in to this one. Then came his mock outburst about his lack of innocence, she chuckled " If your innocent, I am not sarcastic" She spoke her voice dripping with the irony of being sarcastic as she said it. But then he ran his hands through her hair, well the bits that weren't tied in her pony tail. As he said about taking it out her hand slipped up, like before she ran it through her hair, but this time all the way back, pulling the hair band out and letting her hair fall down to her shoulders. She eyes Kistin Curiously " It gets annoying after awhile so I tend just to keep it up" She shrugged, when Kistin had ran his hand through her hair it had felt nice, it was one of those things her parents had always used when she was little to calm her down whenever she had been scared. As to why she did herself, well she did it a lot more when stressed, but she didn't really think about it was just something she did.

She chuckled as he held his hands up in surrender, she doubted he was truly surrendering, if he was like her he was about to use this to his advantage when it came to the game of wits. As he said about a clone Ella again she chuckled " just think if you got put up against the real thing, you have had 107 years to perfect your jokes, me not even 18 yet" she start to tut, a look of disapproval on her face, she really wanted to be tall so she could look down at him, but oh well. Then his attempt at being affronted, she was still not buying it; his eyes gave him away too much, that playful glint they seemed to hold. When he inquired as to her misgiving, she chuckled " your eyes, they are gorgeous, but your right they are like a window into you" She smiled lightly at him.

Then they started on about the bowl, she chuckled at his mock enthusiasm which she continued, she looked at him and continued as though they were being seriously enthusiastic about this " yep and I can get you collar with you name on a little tag that says 'If found, please return to Ella Amelia Smith'" She looked at him encouragingly, she looked all dead serious about the collar but maybe it was because his were doing it but a playful glint in her eye, the same one that had given Kistin away was probably giving her away. Of course Kistin had a retort to her doomed question she smiled, then she played dumb " no, I don't see it and I am really really really clever" she had spoken with a slight lisp, as though she were five and trying to convince him she was clever.

She wondered if she could tell him, that there was a cell for her in Azkaban soon, a cell she had no intention of filling.

They were sitting so close now, after the parted he seemed to pull her closer, her body betraying all normal rules of society to be slow accepted it and happy sat close to him. When he spoke about smell she eyed him lightly, she had seen the other meaning in that, he was very close now. Then he spoke again, he seemed not to have meant, she got the jist, she tasted good enough to eat. She trusted him had he not said that he didn't drink human blood? She started wonder how in control he was. She was glad however when instead of giving the smart answer to her statement something she knew evens he would have considered, he answered more sincerely. She looked into his eyes then he lent in and kissed her, there was no hesitation this time, and she didn't feel him pull back, one of hands slipped round and through his hair before they parted again she looked into his eyes, how in control was he, she eyed him then asked that very question " you said I smelt good, how in control are you?" She then knew that this next one was stupid, but she trusted him, she trusted him to judge his own self control , she drew something from deep within her robes, it was a small sawing kit, one that was designed so magic could influence it to saw on its own. She picked up the needle " want a taste?" She asked she needed to know how in control he was of himself. She quickly pricked herself on one of her fingers and a spot of crimsone appeared on her finger, drop sized, it began to run down her finger.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

"Oh, I'm not trying to get rid of you." He said, shrugging. "Are you trying to get rid of me?" He asked. He looked at her as she replied to his outburst of innocence, and he laughed. "Hey, that's not fair. I'm blatently innocent, and you're blatently sarcastic." He said. When she pulled the hairband out, Kistin saw the curious look on her face. As he went to explain more fully, he heard her words and smiled. He ran his hand through it again, now, right until he reached the ends. "It's beautiful. I could do this for hours," he said, running his hand though it again and again, as softly as he could - the last thing he wanted was to hurt her.

As she brought age up again, he sighed. "I've told you that that means nothing - that I'm still pretty young for a vampire. And anyway, most of those years were either World Wars, Wars in general, changes in Monarchy and so on...and the humour changes constantly. Half the jokes I knew 90 years back would go straight over your head. They make no sense now." He said, shrugging. When she spoke of his eyes, he nodded. "They do. It's awful. I can lie brilliantly...until they look at my eyes." He rolled his eyes. "Sucks to be me, eh?" He laughed. "Well, it did until I came to this cave today." As she mocked his age, he looked at her, as if he was sizing her up. "And when you reach 107, I'll make sure I ask you to conjure a beanbag. You may be a witch, but you're still..." he wrinkled his nose in mock disgust, "human." The truth was, though he'd never tell, he missed his old life. He missed being able to go out into sunlight without fear of dying. He missed being part of a normal group, with normal friends - without everyone running scared of you because of your fangs...and love of blood. He missed looking a normal colour, and being around people of his own age. Sure, how many humans, wizardkind or otherwise, reached 107 years of age and still looked as youthful as if they were no more than 30. None. Everyone seemed to age...everyone except Vampires, and he was sick to death of it. There was another thing, he missed knowing that every day could be his last. Vampires were near enough immortal. He wasn't going to tell Ella that, though. The sheer thought that she could (and probably would) die many years before he would was painful enough for him. To voice it would hurt not just him even more, but her as well. He could handle his own pain - he had done so in the past - but he couldn't add a weight to her shoulders. That wasn't fair. He awoke to the real world, realising he had gone into his own thoughts very deeply, and looked at her, a smile returning to his face; but his eyes, as always, betraying his every emotion.

He then laughed, and smiled more fully as she spoke of a collar. "Oh, great." He said, trying to sound excited. "I'm not a vampire, I'm a pet cat." He said, shaking his head. "Ella, I think you need to read up about Vampires. I really do think you're getting confused." As the five-year-old tried to convince him that she was "really, really, really clever", he patted her head and said, patronisingly, "I know you are. You just need to work on becoming "really, really, really, REALLY clever." He said, chuckling.

As they kissed again, he felt her hand reach around and through his hair. Not often did people get close enough to do that...not often did he allow people to get close enough to do that - but it felt good. He held her around the waist with one hand and stroked her cheek with the other. When they parted, he heard her words and he looked in her eyes. "Controlled enough. Believe me, I spent many months when I was first turned, learning how to control the "blood lust", as it is called." He said. he went into no further detail, but he did see her reach beneath her cloak and pull out a small box. As she picked a needle out, he realised it was a sewing kit. When she spoke again, he looked at her, concerned. As she moved the needle towards her finger, he reached towards it, but it was too late. He saw the drop of blood run down her finger, and he ran his finger along hers, catching it. He glanced at her, but his instinct had kicked in. He placed his finger into his mouth and tasted her blood. It was definitely intoxicating, and the true Vampire within him had awakened. He looked at her, his eyes no longer easy to read, his pupils just pinpricks. It was as if his mind had switched on to some new frequency; a frequency that had not been used for quite some time. In an instant, he had hold of her - not too tightly, but just enough to stop her from getting up. His fangs were clearly visible, and they were moving rapidly towards her neck.

As his lips brushed against her neck, his eyes closed...and all kinds of memories began to be unearthed. Waking up in a dungeon...dark, gloomy and alone. Evander was nowhere to be seen, and Kistin was 20. Longing, just longing for blood. The warm, viscous substance was all he wanted. It was all he needed. People outside, talking to him, their voices were faint, but he could hear them - "We can't let you go, you need to learn to control it"... "You're a danger to others, including your brother."... "Your brother's free, hadn't they told you?" He was frightened, alone, lost and in a small room. He was dangerous and people had to be kept away from him. Why...what had he done to deserve this...?

His eyes snapped open, the pupils dilating again. His breathing was heavy, as if waking from a nightmare. He moved, and realised that his mouth was still open, and on her neck - and that he was holding her. He let go of her arms as if burnt, and moved his face away from her neck. There was no mark, thank heavens, but he was sure she'd be shaken. He glanced at her and then quickly stood up. He turned away and walked quickly across the cave. "I..." he began, his voice constricted and still breathing heavily. "...I'm sorry, Ella. I thought I was more controlled than that. I..." He stopped, and regained his breath. "...I'm so sorry. I didn't know what I was doing. I..." He suddenly found his fist meet a wall. Needless to say, he came off worse than the wall did. He was angry. Not at her, but at himself. He had let himself lose control, and that was unacceptable. "I'm dangerous, Ella." He said, quietly. Looking at the ground, still facing away from her. "You...you shouldn't be near me. I can't risk turning you."

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
Hold On To Me Love
You Know I Can't Stay Long

Again with the getting rid of joke, she merely smiled at him serenely this time, " narr you can stay, I will let you" like she could stop him if he truly wanted to get her out of there, but oh well. Then came his call of innocence, she snorted " second part is correct, but you and innocent just are two things that don't meet" She raised an eye brow, she had not known him for long but she knew that much, anyway, they were only playing. Then he started playing with her hair, she heard his words, she smiled " really I hate it, boring straight brown hair" She closed her eyes for a few moments as he ran his hands through it, she ether loved it or hated it, she liked him doing it, it felt comforting. She smiled then opened her eyes once he had stopped.

Then as he made his excuses about his jokes, she smiled and shook her head "poor excuse" she smiled at him teasingly. Being around him just made her so playful, so light hearted she had not been this relaxed in a while. she then quickly added " No I don't want to hear your 90 year old jokes" she had seen that one coming before he could get it out. She merely smiled as he said about it being bad to be him until he had come into the cave. However when he said about her having to be able to conjure a beanbag, but then the little bit at the end, she chuckled lightly and lent in " I wouldn't expect a Vampire to figure out that I could just ask my cousin to teach me" She looked at him teasingly, but her teasing glint faded away. She had noticed that Kistin had kind of spaced out, the way she sometimes did when thoughts took over. She watched him, he seemed sad almost, her curiosity was about to make her ask what was wrong but she held her question back. She saw him kind of smile back, but not fully; she then slipped a hand into his and looked up at him gently " Penny for your thoughts?" she asked her Irish lilt ringing out in the cave softly like a lullaby.

Then the mood picked up she smiled as he said about being a cat, chuckling lightly She rolled her eyes and continued with her five year old like demeanour " No you’re a Vampire, I know that because I am clever" she nodded to emphasise her point. She was still playing when he patted her head and spoke again, she smiled then dropped the baby act " to be serious for a second your right, I think I was ill during the Vampire lesson, I don't remember much" She smiled and shrugged. When she was looking out the cave her mind had drifted when his voice and touch on her cheek brought her back, she looked back round at him, her hazel eyes catching his in their gaze. She smiled reassuringly but it was not his fun happy smile that had been on her face before. She looked back out the cave at the dots scurrying around Hogsmeade and continued " I only have a term left at Hogwarts, the only reason they let Muggleborns in is for brainwashing everyone else into using us as target practise" She looked back at Kistin " Once I am done, I have fulfilled my purpose, I will be called to register as a Muggleborn and when I can't prove that I have a blood relative who was also a witch or Wizard I will be sent to Azkaban" Just thinking about it gave her the shivers. She drew her knees up and wrapped her arms around them, she looked back out the cave." I have no intention of walking into that place, so when I leave here, I will be on the run" She then looked back at him and weakly smiled at him " It doesn't matter, I have known this for quite some time, Maybe the smart thing would have been to drop out of Hogwarts at a young age and just be a muggle again, it’s what most do. Anyway like I said, It doesn't matter now, I made my stubborn choice" She wanted a change in subject, she hated talking about this, it made her feel down and she didn’t want to feel down, she wanted to feel up, up and alive with Kistin.

She was clear of those thoughts by his lips, his hand around her waist made her feel secure, she never wanted to pull back, she again had that animalistic instinct to go further to get closer, but she did was correct of her and when he pulled back so did she. But then without thinking she had blood on her finger, she had not thought this one through, she watched him take it, wiping it off with his own finger. It was weird but then the fun went. She felt as well saw the sudden change. His eyes changed. She suddenly released how stupid she was, thankfully her finger had already stopped bleeding but that was too late. She blinked and suddenly he was on her, she felt his arms around her, holding her, she tried to wriggle out. Her heart started to pound in her chest and her breath caught as she saw his fangs. She felt his breath on her neck, felt his lips on her neck. She breathed deeply, trying to calm her racing heart. She stayed still in his grasp, not moving, he seemed to have stopped, and she stayed still. She was so stupid, she shouldn't have done it, and this was not fair on him. He suddenly moved, letting her go, she saw his eyes were back to normal. She was still breathing deeply and her heart was still pounding in her chest. She eyed him as he suddenly stood up, then turned and walked away. She was about to speak when he did, She was regaining her breath and heart beat. She watched him and listened in silence. All the while she was mentally slapping herself for being so stupid, after all their joking, she was the true let down, and she wasn't as great as he had said. She slowly got up then spoke her voice quiet but strong " Don't go" she suddenly felt so small, so young saying it she continued " I was stupid, I shouldn't have done it, It’s not fair on you for me to even do something like that" She took a step forward " I trust you, I want to be your friend" She then threw caution to the wind, she didn’t care they had only met the once " maybe more" she added lightly. She stood there in her too small clothes, her shoulder length hair hanging down ruffled where he had played with it, hazel eyes gazing at him softly like orbs.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

Kistin smiled. "So it's a matter of letting me stay, now, is it?" He asked, lightly. As she retorted about his innocence, he laughed. "How do you know, my dear Ella? You've only just met me. Who knows, this could all be a clever ruse...and I could turn out to be a completely sweet and innocent guy underneath." He was almost shaking with the effort of restraining his laughter and so he let it out. "Ok, ok, that was too hard to pretend. Yeah, okay, you win. I'm not innocent. At all."

Her comments about her hair made Kistin smile. "I like it. It's all soft and pretty. And I like straight hair. Curly hair is hard to run my fingers through." He laughed. "God, I sound so shallow. What I mean is that I really like your hair and it suits you." Kist wasn't just about looks - he liked personality - and Ella had a lot of that. As she told him it was a "poor excuse" about his jokes, he looked shocked. "It's not. It's true." He said, puffing himself out slightly. When he went to carry on, he heard her jump in. "Hey, that's not on. I'm not predictable, am I? Please tell me I'm not that predictable." He begged, laughing. She then commented on getting Tonks to teach her and he retorted. "And I wouldn't expect a witch to know that when you're 107, you probably won't want beanbags." He grinned.

As he returned from his memories, he felt Ella's hand in his. When she spoke, he looked at her and pursed his lips. Eventually, he looked at her, a sight from on his face, and began to speak. "You don't realise how lucky you are." There was no malice in his voice; it was plain and almost wistful. "Even as a muggleborn." He looked to the ground, sighed and then looked back to her. "You can feel the sunlight without dying, you have normal friends who don't run away from you because you have fangs and might eat them. You have people who are your age around you, rather than being centuries older than everyone else, but looking a quarter of that age. You know that one day will be your last, and you know you're getting closer as life goes on." He sighed and dropped his eyes to the floor. "I don't have any of that. Sunlight's a curse, anyone who I might get close to - minus the few people like you - run away scared, I'm older than most people here...and I'm pretty much as close as anyone's gonna get to being immortal." He gave a half laugh, and then looked back to her. "Be glad, Ella, that you've got the chance to have some kind of "life"...rather than this half-life we Vampires get. Sure, you go through Hell being a muggleborn...but if you go through Hell, there's nothing else to hurt you once you're through, eh?" He let that hang in the air, before continuing.

As he heard her response, he laughed, glad to get that weight off of his shoulders. "Well done!" He said, in the same patronising voice. "Not we just have to get you to realise that bowls and collars and stuff are not what Vampires ought to have or wear." As she became more serious he looked at her. "Then I think you might want to. Sure, they've probably messed about a bit to make us look awful, but there'll be some truths in the books at school."

As he reassured her, he saw her look back and was concerned by the look on her face. He was about to ask when she told him anyway. It wasn't something he had been expecting. "I wouldn't let you go to Azkaban." He said, firmly. This time, his hand slipped into hers. "You did the best thing for you by staying at Hogsmeade and sticking it out, ok? You've done yourself a world of favours by staying." He brushed her hair back slightly, putting it behind her ear. "If you run, I'll run with you. I'm not gonna let you be alone. You're a strong girl, but I don't want you to feel like you're on your own. Let me know when you're going to go - and I'll make sure I'm there with you. I promise. I've been needing a change of scenery, anyway." It'd break his heart to leave Evander, but he could tell that Ella needed someone to lean on, and he had already decided that he'd fill that need.

After he had...lost control...for lack of better words, Kistin heard her reply. "No," he said, in a fierce half-whisper. He forced his vocal chords to work again, and then turned back to her. She looked pale and was breathing almost as heavily as he was. His features, etched with a mix of fear and rage, softened slightly, and he held his head in a hand. "It's not your fault." He said, the fierceness gone, replaced with regret. "I'm the Vampire. I'm the one who spent months in a dungeon below St. Mungo's Hospital when I was 20, learning how to control this...this thing. I'm the one who, after 87 years, should have been able to restrain himself. Ella, if there is one thing you shouldn't do, it's blame yourself. I've been around many people who have been injured before, and never reacted like that. I'm to blame entirely, and I won't hear another word saying any different."

However, as she mentioned being his friend - or more - he took his hand from his head, and looked at her. "You're prepared to stay with me? Even though I almost turned you?" He looked at her dubiously. "You're in shock. You don't know what you're saying and you don't know what it means." He said, finally. He walked towards her slowly and cautiously - trying not to frighten her any more; trying to show that he was no longer a threat - and slowly sat down next to her again. Not too close, but not too far away. His hand throbbed from when he had hit the wall and he looked down to see grazed knuckles, and a few specks of blood. He disregarded them completely, and wrapped his hand in his long coat, hoping to encourage the blood to clot. He really wasn't in an eating mood. He realised then what he had admitted - that he had been in that dungeon. Damn his big mouth.

He turned to Ella and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'd love for you to be a friend of mine. And, if you are sure of what you said, I wouldn't mind you being something more." He said quietly. He looked on the ground of the cave, and spotted the needle laying there, the tip covered in Ella's blood. He leant across and picked it off the floor, examining it. He removed his hand from his coat, and swung the end of it over to his lap. He chose the cleanest part he could find of the silk lining and wiped it. He took Ella's hand, and placed the needle on ehr palm, careful not to stab her. "I'd suggest putting it away and cleaning it properly when you get a chance." He said, quietly. He felt drained. He hadn't needed that - but nor had he planned for it. He had never had that issue before. What had made Ella so different? He toyed with the idea of leaning over and giving her a hug - saying sorry...but he felt too afraid to. He had seen how she had looked, and he dared not risk frightening her more. In his mind, a thought had stuck.

He was a Vampire. He was frightening. He was going to have to live with it.

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
hold on to me love
you know i can't stay long

It was nice having someone tell her it was a good thing to be at Hogwarts, it rarely happened. She generally got the unwelcome vibe from that place. His words were soft like blankets comforting on the bed of scratchy straw that was everyone else. A hand placed some of her hair behind her ear. Hazel eyes looked back up at him, gratitude gleaming out from them and from the smile on her face; it was a gratitude that could not be summed up in words. It meant more to her then he would realise. Having someone care like that was a rare treat and it only deepened the warm blanket she felt when about him. She voiced her thoughts in one words " Thanks" but mostly her expression would have done the talking.

When he turned back to her she saw on his face and in his eyes the mix of fear and rage in him, she tried to fix her breathing and heart rate. As he spoke he sounded like he was in pain. She again mentally slapped herself, she was so sorry. She had ruined what had been a very good time. She looked unhappy but she realised and put on her very good poker face. She had to have a good poker face or she would never have survived her many confrontations at school. But then he began to spoke, she could hear all the raging emotions in his voice; the regret was the most dominant. She then heard about St Mungos, they had a dungeon in St Mungos? She kept her poker face though, she didn't want to upset him anymore then he was. But her mind whirled. She had been locked in classroom, broom cupboards, even a box at one point. But not for more than a few hours. She was suddenly reminded of how much younger and naive she was compared to him. She felt like a little girl that had been scowled, even more as he took her words and threw them back at her. She almost flinched as he spoke in the dubious tone. Had it been anyone else, she probably would have yelled back telling them that she bloody well knew what she was talking about and she knew more about herself then him. But it was Kistin, it didn't seem right to yell at him, her fire that drove her to argue just didn't spark, in fact it only dampened her. As he moved closer it made her feel even sillier, now he was treating her like a scared little girl. It made her feel like a little girl but she was no longer scared, she could see he was fine now and although she knew he could turn back at any second, something told her he wouldn't. Ella rarely trusted people the way she was now trusting Kistin, he was one of the few people who had successfully managed to get her to open up to him without much difficulty. Her eyes caught the sky momentarily; they had probably been talking for a couple of hours now yet she felt like she had known him for longer. Her eyes caught his grazed knuckles and she was caught with a desire to help, but he wrapped it up in his coat before she could.

Ella sat still watching him carefully, a guarded expression on her face, she didn’t portray any emotion to him, until he placed a hand on her shoulder, like pushing a button she relaxed although the impassive expression did not leave her. She wanted him close again, but he wasn’t coming any closer. She sat still watching him take the needle and wipe it down, when he placed it on her palm, drew her warm and tapped it, and it thing cleaned, she replaced the needle in the sawing kit and put it in her bag. She noticed he looked exhausted, but now she was unsure, did he still want her, or had she blown her chances of finally having something good in her wizarding life by acting like a stupid little girl. She had no idea of what to do, so she just sat, awquad. She still felt incredibly guilty about what had happened, and she highly doubted anything he said would change that. She eyed him, looking again into his ice blue eyes, encase this was the last time and he changed his mind about meeting up again and being with her while she was on the run.

[KISTIN THEODORE CROSS !]

Kistin pulled Ella tighter as he saw her look of gratitude. When she thanked him, he waved his free hand. "Just because I seem to be one of the most human people in this country, doesn't mean you need to thank me." He chuckled gently. "Ironic, isn't it? A Vampire is more Human than the Humans." He stroked her cheek with his hand.

However, once he had lost control, his whole demeanour changed. As he walked away, he was breathing heavily. He couldn't believe how close he had come to forcing the half-life he had been bitter about only earlier that day, upon the one person he cared more about than any other - maybe excepting Evander. He had almost ruined her life even more. And she was so full of praise for him and so charming beforehand...how could he have...

He hated himself. He hated himself more than the Pureblood Supremacists, more than the people who had forced him to stay in the tiny cage at St. Mungo's, more than the Vampires who had turned him in the first place. He had said he would attack anyone who dared to hurt her...and he had almost hurt her himself. He was a hypocrite...and a dangerous hypocrite at that. He was no better than any other blood-lusting Vampire on the street. No, he was lower than that, even they had morals. Even they would not harm those they cared about.

He turned to face her again, his eyes showing fear, rage and self-loathing. And in the brief seconds he caught her eyes, he felt his own well up with tears. He turned away quickly, furiously wiping them away before they had a chance to fall. What was wrong with him? Never, since those months, 87 years beforehand, had he cried. What had this girl unlocked? And why did she have to unlock it as he lost control of his bloodlust? He felt his hand throb in his coat lining, and he concentrated on focussing all his anger and rage and whatever else, on that. He unwrapped it and took a look at it. Bits of stone and grit and stuff had got into it, but he could wash it out when he got back. He grimaced and turned back.

He saw Ella's face, as if nothing had happened, and he stood there looking at her. "You don't have to hide it, okay?" He said, plainly. "I know you're not okay. Even if you look it."

After sitting and handing her the needle, he watched her clean it and then put it away, and he decided to tentatively shuffle closer to her. Would she still want him around? Would she still want to see him again? For him to join her in the spring holiday? He wanted to wrap his arms around her, and just hold her tightly...to explain what he did and try to make it right...but his mind wouldn't let him. He couldn't physically hold her. His arms were refusing to respond.

He moved as close as he dared, and then he tried to speak, even just to say a "sorry", but as he tried, he got a lump in his throat. He tried a few times, and then decided it was not going to work. Sitting there in silence, all he could do was gently reach for her hand, and just hope she didn't pull away.

[ELLA AMELIA SMITH !]

Ella Smith
hold on to me love
you know i can't stay long

Ella was always very sure of herself, she hat to be, if she wasn't she would never have survived Hogwarts this far. Being unsure somewhat frightened her, she was unsure about her future and Kistin had been one of the few people for her to actually show some glint of that fear she held for that uncertainty. However now her face was stony. She had always hidden her emotions it was habit, she had never really had someone she trusted before enough to show them to. It was more out of habit she kept her face still now. However when she managed to catch his eyes, she was sure he was about to cry, she felt like crying, she hadn’t in years. She did not try to see if he actually was. She had not got the crying openly kind of vibe from him. She just sat stunned at her own stupidity.

She had always been impulse and when she sometimes got carried away. Although she hadn’t recently. The problem was she hadn't been that happy in ages, in years. When she went home to her parents she quiet and withdrawn, none of her old friends from her last school were approachable, she was just too different. So now, when someone finally accepts her and makes her truly happy without much effort, someone who she could truly be herself around. Although she wondered if she could, had she spoilt everything she could have had with one childish mistake?

Then he spoke, breaking the terrible silence between them. She looked up, still not showing a trace of emotion but it was obviously nothing like before, before she had not been afraid to show it, now she was blank. She eyed him, was he angry at her, she was afraid of losing him, had she gone too far and annoyed him with her constant teasing. She eyed him then sighed, she wanted to hug him, to tell him it was alright, to tell him she didn't mind, and she wanted him. But the nagging doubt of that fact she had been rejected one after the other by every other person in the wizarding community was just playing at her mind. Maybe he would decide it was not worth the bother, after alls he was a muggleborn. She noticed how he was edging closer, she did the same, but only a littler not wanting for him to reject, her. She might manage to keep her facade up enough to get out of there if he rejected her, but she doubted she would make it back to the castle before breaking down.

The silence enveloped her and consumed her. She felt more like a scowled little girl as every second went by; she stared at a wall, her sense losing her and abandoning her. She had no idea what to do, she was unsure if she should approach or just stay put. She then saw a hand drift towards her, her hands dropped to it and then glanced at Kistin and rather than waiting she moved her hand to his, slowly curling her fingers into his. She was still trying to hold it all in, but she was about to break. She glanced up at Kistin; she felt his fingers in hers. Then she moved the rest of the distance between them and wrapped her arms around him slowly and loosely. She gave him the chance to pull away. She felt fear flood through her, she was uncertain, uncertain if she would be rejected yet again and become alone again. She just whispered in his ear " Sorry" and then the tears welled in her eyes, she would not take rejection, tears dripped down her face, but she did not sob, no hysterical crying just silent tears running down her pale face " Please don't leave me". Her Irish lilted voice had a pleading tone to it, almost begging. No one ever made her feel this vulnerable or scared, only him.